Give Love

(I posted this to the Saving Shea but wanted to share it here too.)

Because it's February.

Because I just decorated my house in pink and red hearts.

Because Valentines are not just for couples...but friends, mommies, daddies, siblings, classmates and neighbors.

Because everybody needs love. And not the romantic comedy, butterflies in your stomach, plucking petals off daisies kind of love.

They need the "I'm yours forever" kind of love.

The "we can do this together" kind of love.

The "can't stop starring at you" kind of love.

The "I'm always there for you" kind of love.

The "I can't keep myself from smiling around you" kind of love.

The "I promise to make time to laugh with you" kind of love.

The "everything you say is so important to me" kind of love.

The " I couldn't be prouder of you in this moment" kind of love.

The love that lifts you up....

Squeezes you tight...

Makes even hard times feel alright..

The love that teaches you all that you need to know...

And gives you support you need to grow...

The undeniable you were made for me...

And together we make a family...

What's mine is yours...

I treasure each kiss...

And everyone deserves to feel like this...

Kind of Love.

Because real love is something that cannot be bought - only shared. We need it from the time we are born - and those of us who having loving families know that NOTHING could have replaced that. The love of family - the love I was given as a child - made me who I am today. It teaches us how to love the rest of our lives. It can never be truly expressed in the form of greeting cards, chocolates, flowers, or jewelry. Those sweet tokens and gestures give momentary happiness - it's the feeling love behind them that really means anything at all. So with that in mind, and in the spirit of this holiday of love - I would like to propose the perfect gift for your loved ones.

Give the gift of Love itself.

Give Love.

You can bring joy and love not only to those who hold your heart -

but to child who needs your help.

Give Love.

By helping one little boy come home to the family who is waiting to give him this kind of love. The kind of love every single one of these children pictured above are given every day.

The kind of love so many of us are blessed to have.

The kind of love he deserves.

Give Love.

Shea's story is a remarkable one - and it is only just beginning. He now has a family ready for him - and Shea is WAITING to come home. His family is actively completing the adoption process - eager to give Shea the love, support and care only a family can give. The only thing wecan do to help them bring Shea home as soon as possible is to GIVE.

Give what you have.

$5, $25, $50

It's not the size of the gift, but the size of the heart behind it.

GIVE LOVE.

It is so costly to adopt internationally - so much so that many people say "we can't afford that" or "it's just not possible for us". But this family has given everything they have not once, not twice, but 3 TIMES (read their blog - they are an amazing family)and is making that leap of faith to make Shea a part of their family - but they need help raising the last bits.

(And in adoption language, "bits" = $9,000!)

They need our HELP!

As a friend so honestly reminded me " Let's face it ... we all spend/waste $$$ on this every year. The chocolate is gone...the flowers die... and all you have is a distant memory of the token(s) you invested in."

How much more meaningful - how much more noble - how much more true to what love is all about - to give that money instead to this family - to this little boy -

to bring him home - to give him Love.

So help share the love...with Shea. :)

Isn't that the most adorable Valentine ever?!

It's message is simple - it's purpose sincere.

Make a donation (even just $5!) in the name of a friend or loved one - to Shea's Adoption Grant (through the chipin on the right hand margin of this page) or visit his family's blog and donate through their chipin (it all goes to his account.) Then print out these adorable Shea Valentines(see Donation Gift Cards for the printable link) and give them to your sweetie, your sister, your mother, your friend - and see their faces light up at the sweet face on the card.

I can't think of a sweeter, kinder, more beautiful way to Give Love.

Can you?

(visit www.savingshea.blogspot.com to read about Shea's story

as well as view and print these Valentines)

Thank you. With Love ~ Joanna

Every Joy

Last night was a rare night. I am blessed to call it rare as it is all to familiar to some of my friends. Last night I had a "monster-under the bed" moment. And it surprised me. And I can't stop thinking about it. Last night Jet woke up crying at 1:30am. Not completely unheard of, but this kid is a GOOD sleeper. He doesn't wake up very often. And if he does he puts himself back to sleep without much fuss. But I can always tell when he needs me to come in there - it's a different cry - and last night I heard it. So I went in to hold him and rock him for a few minutes (he never lets me rock him for long) then lay him back down with his blankets to settle back into sleep. However this time he didn't settle back down. He cried as soon as I put him down and cried when I tried to rock him again. He didn't want to be left alone. He didn't want to be held. He didn't want a drink. He didn't want his diaper changed (though I did it anyway). He didn't want his daddy to rock him. He didn't seem to want anything. Nothing was making him feel better and though it had only been 20min or so I was already feeling desperate. This just doesn't happen with Jet. He doesn't do this. I laid him down and rubbed his back and brushed the curls away from his forehead and he seemed to relax. But as soon as I left he was crying again. I went to back to our my room and held the monitor in my lap as he fussed on the other end - willing him to go back to sleep with every part of my mind and praying that it was nothing. He wasn't feverish - but I'd given him some motrin anyway in case it was those incisor teeth bothering him. He'd been constipated the last few days until today and everything was finally "moving" again so maybe his tummy was hurting him. Maybe he was just angry that he woke up. Maybe he was just disoriented.

But that voice in my head kept chanting....maybe....maybe....maybe it is our turn.

If you have a child with SB or any other chronic illness or disability you absolutely know what I'm talking about. You feel like your good luck is only going to last so long. You feel like when things are good it's only a matter of time before the other shoe falls. When you hear about other people facing trial after trial, surgery after surgery, illness after illness, you think "that could be me." At any moment....it could be my turn. You try not to panic. You try to stay positive. But the reality of it is - you have big monsters hiding under your bed. Bigger than an occasional cold or stomach flu. Monsters lurking in the dark - so illusive and impossible to predict - so hard to be sure of even if you think you see them...is it a monster...or only the shadow of something not scary at all.

By the time I was brain-deep in contemplating it all - wide awake and stomach churning - I noticed the monitor had been silent for several minutes. Jet was asleep. I didn't dare breathe a deep sigh or relax just yet. But as the night went on, and I eventually drifted back off to sleep, I begin to thank God for granting us rest. I woke up eager for Jet to wake up so I could see how he was feeling. To my relief he woke up smiling and ready for breakfast. Totally happy. Totally normal. Nothing scary. It was just a shadow on the wall after all.

But as I sorted through some of the pictures I took yesterday at the park, I was still thinking about last night. And little by little all the pictures seemed to flow together to form a series of tiny lessons - all reminding me of what life is really all about.

And I loved how once again, God was using my little miracle boy, to help me, to teach me, to bring me closer to Him.

Life always changing.

It can take you by surprise.

Sometimes you're holding on tight.

Other times... you learn to let go.

And there are those times when life leaves you thinking "I don't get it."

But that's okay. We won't always understand. That's where faith comes in. Hold on to that.

In life, there will be things you love...

Things you cling to...

And search after...

And sometimes, you might get distracted and loose sight of those things you love the most...

But don't worry, you can always find them again...if you'll only look around.

Enjoy the freedoms you have been given.

But don't take advantage of them.

Stay away from darkness. It's never a good idea - the further you get away from the light, the harder it is to find your way back to it.

Life is messy. Don't be afraid of it - it is only in life's imperfections that we realize we are not in control.

And never be ashamed to ask for help. For His strength is made perfect in weakness.

We have been given so much. Sometimes more than we know what to do with. I am sitting here right now - knowing that the monster won't always stay tucked away under the bed. Does it scare me. Yes. But does it take away from the joy I have today? No.

I have a child. A little boy who was born with Spina Bifida.

And with this diagnosis comes certain "extras".

Yes there are many unknowns.

There are obstacles and burdens.

Yes we have certain fears and worries that maybe other parents do not have.

But do you know what?

Do you know what I realized as I watched my son play happily in the damp, chilly mulch at the park? I may have "extra" things in my life.

But I'm not missing anything.

Wow - that just sent little thrills to my heart. I have to say it again. :)

I am not missing anything.

What a wonderful reality.

I have so much - so many beautiful "extras" I never dreamed I would have. I know so many of you feel the same. Isn't that amazing? So while we may have a few "extras" to deal with. That's just the point - they are extras - not taking away from all the things we do have -

just adding to them.

So thank you little boy. Thank you rainy day at the park.

Thank you God for reminding me.

I have every hope.

I have every blessing.

I have every joy.

Conversations with my Cutie

The following conversation did not actually happen "word for word"...but this is what I took away from it.

Hi Jet - what are you eating?

Who me?

Of course you. What are you eating?

A powdered sugar donut from Nina's house.

Ohh. I should have known you got that from Nina's house. But why are you wiping all the crumbs in your hair?

Cause I want some more.

Well what do we do when we want more of something?

Hmm...I know this...what is it....

Stare sweetly at mommy?

No.

Pitch a fit?

No. Think about your good manners.

Hmm...

Ohhh! I remember! We say...

Yes that's it! Good job Jet! And you annunciated it so perfectly. I would have been happy with "peas" but that was lovely. Thank you for using your good manners.

You're welcome, Mommy.

Can you hear me now?

Our little guy turns 20 months tomorrow (stop it right now little boy! you're approaching 2yrs too quickly) and although he has surpassed so many of our expectations - walking to the point of wanting to run - why do kids do that?! - and now able to carry objects across the room and even push himself up to stand in the middle of the room (wow. I mean wow. I was impressed) there is one area that had to be looked into. Speech. Our little guy is not a talker - though he has grown increasingly verbal as his walking has kicked in - his expressive vocabulary is still stuck at "mama" and "dada". He can find a ball, cat, ring, train, book, blanket, duck, cow, penguin, hat, puppy, cup, m&m, lion (should I go on? you get it right) in any scenario - but he has no interest in "saying" anything. Therefore we are taking the next step - a speech evaluation. The first thing on our "to-do" list from our PT was to have his hearing checked again. So while we were pretty sure he could hear - we couldn't be sure how well he was hearing each sound - so we took him yesterday for his hearing test. And...drumroll please....HE PASSED with flying colors. :) Our little guy can hear just fine - which means when I say his name and he doesn't turn around or I yell "stop!" when he's running away from me in Target and he keeps going...he's just ignoring me...cute Jet...real cute...

Almost as cute as these adorable Koala ears.

Thanks Auntie Katie - you're so crafty. ;)

So for now - we know it's not a hearing difficulty. So we can proceed with meeting with a speech therapist and see if she can teach my child to yell "No!" at me instead of "Baa!" like he does right now. Won't that be great. ;)

But I'm not too worried. I want him to be able to communicate with me - I don't want him to get frustrated - but he's pretty good at getting his point across - so I'm going to be patient with the "talking" and take it one day at a time. After all...that's how we got to this point...one day at a time and now my little boy is running down hills in his Nina's front yard.

To be fair there is really no way not to "run" down a hill with all that gravity working with ya.

And admit it - it is so much fun.

I have no idea what happened with this picture - but there is something kind of magical about it.

Everyday is something new -

Sometimes it's big - sometimes it's just little changes that let you know life is still going...

the earth is still spinning...

Laughter is still contagious...

Love is still abounding...

And all of it....all of Life...is a wonderful...beautiful...gift.