Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Oh October...

How you have come with a flurry of falling leaves and busy, breezy days full of activity and never enough hours of sunlight. I don't know how to keep up with your energy but I am uplifted by your enthusiasm. You are Autumn - and I love everything about you.

I love the traditions you bring to our family - and the way they mean something new and exciting every year when seen through the eyes of the little guy.

(apparently Little Pumpkin ("kin-kin") has made it into the club now.)

I love how your fresh air is so inviting, that we have spontaneous outside time throughout the day...
...even in our pj's.

(Jet's current favorite pair of pj's and a preview of costumes to come. :) I can hardly stand it!)

I love your warm and vibrant colors both inside and out.

I love that my little guy spent almost an hour just walking through the pumpkin display at Home Depot in a magical trance, and I love how that action inspired me to buy 8 pumpkins of all sizes to live in and around our house for the season.
(You should know...my husband does not love this about you. But don't worry we're working on that.)

I love the anticipation of the holidays - the festivities and family time. I love that you make me want to plan parties that we have absolutely no time for - but before I can reason with you I've somehow sent the invitations.
Oh well. I guess we'll have a party. ;)

I love tiny hands holding tiny fall treasures.

I love how just a slight drop in temperatures can make me want pack up Boo and head out to a high school football game (even without Daddy!?) and stay the whole time and not get bored. ;)

(Aunt Kelly coaches the JV cheer-leaders at NPHS. And we love us some Aunt Kelly.)

(And apparently we love us some cheerleaders too. lol)

(okay...and he loves his Uncle Nate...)

(seriously... he loves him...)

I love how I can make him wear hats because "it's cold outside" when really I just think he looks ridiculously cute in them. And when he fusses and I insist - I love how you make me feel justified. After all - you are Fall.

I love how he was slightly afraid of the "big, bad wolf"...

But just too curious to leave him alone.

I love how your beautiful weather allows us to get outside and create new and fun-filled memories every season.

And Just in case you didn't know...

(my beautiful SB necklace given to me by my sweet friend Karen that magical summer)

And oh October, how I truly LOVE that about you.

Reading my post from last year I am amazed at how I feel the exact same way about this thing we call Spina Bifida. And I love how we are redefining it. I love how family and friends come together to remind others of what Spina Bifida is, what it looks like, what it means. I love seeing t-shirts and keychains and jewelry and bracelets being sold to raise awareness. I love seeing Walk n' Rolls across the country being held to raise money and support for our children and friends who are on this journey with us. I love reading blog after blog after blog after blog and seeing my sweet friends share the stories and testimonies of the beautiful, radiant, inspiring, incredible faces of Spina Bifida.
I love educating others on something that's so important, so prevalent, so life-changing, and yet so over-looked.
I love showing the world that Spina Bifida isn't a death sentence, but neither is it something insignificant to be ignored.
I love raising awareness, bringing hope, shinning light, sharing lives of those who live with
Spina Bifida.
Because rest assured...we LIVE with it.

(Aunt Kayleigh had to be on defense against an aggressive toddler with a soccer ball. Who, by the way, thought it was all very hilarious.)

And while I don't love the worry, anger, fear, frustration, confusion, and hurt that come from
traveling this journey with Spina Bifida.

I love these people.

And I love that my family, my faith, my friends, my purpose is what it is today - because of Spina Bifida.

I love you October...

...and every little thing you mean to us.

~ Happy Fall ~

Wednesday, September 28, 2011


Recently, when asked how things are going, I find myself saying the same thing "we're good - just super busy."

I know I'm not the only one who is busy - everyone is busy. We all have appointments to make, jobs to do, groceries to buy, emails to check, people to call, and usually at least one "someone" who depends on us to make sure all these things get taken care of for them as well (kids, pets, elderly parents, husbands, ;) - there's always someone). And therefore, we are all pretty busy. But I'm talking super busy here folks.
Super: great, extreme, or excessive
Super busy is the kind that makes your head hurt and all your neatly organized thoughts suddenly jumble up and fly out of your head because you can't keep it all straight anymore. Super busy takes 3 email accounts, a constant stream of text messaging and regular facebook checks on your smart phone to keep it all straight. The kind of busy that makes caffeine out of the question because you're already so jittery from the adrenaline rushes that are frequently coursing through you to keep you going. The kind of busy that inevitably leads to putting the milk in the pantry, wearing your clothes inside out or locking the keys in the car. The kind of busy that keeps you from BLOGGING?! ;) The kind of busy that starts off as exciting, motivating, productive, even exhilarating as you cross things off your list and give multi-tasking a new meaning - but ends with you staring at your computer while your little one naps thinking "what am I supposed to be doing...I know I'm supposed to be doing something...oh yeah, there are 10 things I'm supposed to be doing! Where do I start?!" So, overwhelmed, you try to just reprogram and take a nap, and just as you lay down your 2 year old wakes up early from his nap. Yep. Right on cue.
But - this is not a cry for help post. Though I know I could get tones of encouragement and "been there done that - hang in there" comments from my amazing friends and family - I'm not writing for that. Because I can honestly say that even though life is super busy - and I can get literally dizzy from working and planning and thinking and doing all that we are doing -
I am happy.
I really am. I admittedly can get overwhelmed and stressed and have my "oh no! how am I going to do all this?" moments where I call David or my mom and talk really fast and make no sense and confuse them so that they can only say "I'm sorry...what would help you?" Those moments aren't overtaking my life. (And I hope my "therapists" don't think otherwise! lol). Because honest-to-goodness - I am well.
I am not sad. I am not angry. I am not anxious.
I am happy.
I am super happy.
I am happy because I know that this won't last forever We've been super busy before. Things will calm down a little, life will slow down a little, and there is nothing going on so crazy, stressful or hectic that I can't keep my perspective.
We are healthy.
That is something I hope I never take for granted. I know too many babies, children, mommies and daddies who daily face health concerns we haven't had to face. My heart goes out to them in the deepest way. And I am so happy and thankful for our blessings of health. I can face all the therapies, surgeries and "extras" in the world if I can see my little boy wake up happy and feeling good in the morning. Every morning that happens is blessing. A beautiful blessing that I am grow more aware of every day. Every night Jet and I pray together - and in our prayers I can't tell you how many times I pray for God to keep him healthy. I thank Him over and over for how blessed we have been - and flat out beg Him to continue to protect my baby. Sometimes I forget I'm praying with my 2 year old until I feel a little hand grab my face like "wrap things up mommy, I'm ready for bed." I try not to worry about his health, his future - but it hurts my heart to think about him being sick, or suffering from one of the many SB hurts I know are possible. We've faced a few. And God will brings us through any future trials. But I never forget to let Him know how grateful we are - and how earnestly we ask Him to continue these good days. The super busy, super good days.
We are home.
Every time I hear of families who are separated for various reasons (hospitalizations, military leave, job-transfers, etc) I think of what a blessing it is to all be home together. I remember when Jet was still in the NICU and we would come home without him each night - it was hard. I have so many friends who have to split up - for weeks, months at a time - between their babies at home and their babies in the hospital. Wanting so bad to be mommy to all their little ones at once - unable to be with one child because you're with another. It has to be so hard. Being separated from family. Being away from home. Waiting to be with the ones you love again. That is real cause for stress. That's the kind of anxiety and fatigue that I know we could be facing - but we're not. Not right now. And that is a blessing for which I am super thankful.
And God reminds me of these blessings in the most wonderful way possible. He shows me that I can handle the super-busy right now - because I have Him. And He is SUPERIOR.
And because He gave me him...

My little super-man.

To keep me going.

To keep me laughing.

To remind me to enjoy the little moments, the simple pleasures of being together.

The incomparable joy and peace that comes from being loved like this.

From being allowed to love like this.

And to cause me stop and think about what really matters. What my purpose is, and am I fulfilling it. To count everyday as the blessing it is and never take for granted the gifts we've been given. To take the bad with the good, and then appreciate the good more deeply. To not allow myself be become too distracted or so busy that I forget the big picture. To never underestimate the beauty of simplicity and rest. I want that. And I know I need only to seek it. And I will.

Because the bottom line is...we are super blessed.

So the next time someone asks me how things are going...

Maybe my response should be "we're good...we're just super."

And leave it at that. :)

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